DailySusan Humor Blog

SACK OF WIGS

. . . (B)ut I am among you as he that serveth.
-- Luke 22:27c

Our third daughter Eden was a happy baby. We nicknamed her “Beamer” because she smiled all the time. Still does.

She has a glow about her, from her honey-colored hair to her high-beam smile, polished by the ever-present laughter from the Four F’s: Friends, Family, Fun and Fone.

She’s a top student, a senior leader. She bats fourth on the defending state champion softball team. She’s never been in trouble, except when she was small and wrote on the wall a love note to her teddy bear and security blanket: “Bonkey and Blankey, Together Forever.”

Well, one afternoon last week, the phone rang. It was the strained, serious voice of the principal. “Mrs. Williams? Eden has been in an accident. I think she’s OK, but they put her on a stretcher with a neck brace and took her away in an ambulance. . . .”

Stretcher!?! Neck brace!?! Ambulance!?! AAAAIIIIEEEE!!!!

Right after school, she had been moving her car to be closer to the bus so that, late that night, when they returned from the softball team’s away game, she wouldn’t have to lug her heavy bag clear across the parking lot.

But in the process, she was broadsided by a speeding 16-year-old in his mother’s fiance’s car. He slammed into her beloved little red Mitsubishi Eclipse.

According to the police report, he was going at least 30 mph. Her car was probably totaled. On the way there, I prayed: Oh, God, let her be OK. Oh, Lord, protect and heal. Oh, Jesus, thank You she wasn’t killed.

In the emergency room, she looked 6 years old. Her tear-streaked face was downcast. She was laying back. There was a fly on her leg, and she didn’t even swat it.

AAAAIIIIEEEE!!!! She’s PARALYZED!!!!

The things that go through a mother’s mind. . . .

But we hugged and cried, because she’s fine. Really! It’s a miracle. They didn’t even do an X-ray. She just has a bruised elbow.

The doctor advised her not to play in the next two softball games, and gave her a muscle relaxant.

“So you don’t think she’ll need a sedative?” I asked. No. Just watch her.

She walked out of the E.R., and her boyfriend leaped up and hugged her. He’s a college man now, and I got my first look at his new (gulp) goatee and (gulp) earring and (gulp) longer hair.

I turned to the nurse. “How about a sedative for ME?!?!?”

We ran to Dairy Queen for medicinal purposes, and reviewed the accident . . . seeing God’s provision, as you always can. Whenever one person helps and serves another, He is there.

A mom who is a nurse was there driving a carpool, and took charge ‘til the ambulance arrived.

Several friends took pictures of the scene and her car with their cell phones.

An assistant principal hopped into the ambulance with her. Another had the car towed. The principal arrived in the E.R., and told how there were three police cars and a fire truck at the scene.

One of Eden’s best friends volunteers at that hospital, and read stories to Maddy in the waiting room while it all got sorted out.

Her teammates were upset. They were tied 0-0 midway through their away game, when Eden arrived in sweats. She told them she should have come in a fake head wrap and body cast in a wheelchair. They went out and had a four-run inning and won the game.

But my favorite memory was a message on our answering machine from another assistant principal. “I collected everything that was left in Eden’s car before it was towed,” he stated, “her purse, her backpack, her softball equipment . . . and her sack of wigs.”

Yes, wigs. They were left over from the hilarious initiation rituals Eden and the other seniors put the softball freshmen through a while ago.

That was just God’s way of giving us all a little comic relief. I mean, we were all concerned. But with His loving provision all around, there was no reason to . . . flip our wigs.

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Prayer request: There’s a family in Nebraska dealing with extreme joy and extreme sorrow right now, needing the Savior’s tender loving care. A nephew, a college freshman, died inexplicably while playing touch football in Lincoln. A description of the funeral: “His former FFA friends lined one aisle of the church. His classmates and former teammates lined the other aisle, and his new fraternity brothers lined the center aisle. Four people fainted. His mother’s sobs could be heard throughout the church. There were also people in the basement and outside. The service itself was very nice, ending with the song, ‘I've Never Been More Homesick Now.’ The 15-mile processional to the cemetery had miles and miles of vehicles. On the side of the road stood a John Deere tractor with a hand-painted sign leaning against it which read, ‘Watch over us, Rob’" . . but in the same extended family, there was joy . . . because a newly adopted son arrived from Korea. Luke was greeted by about 35 friends and family members. He was laughing and smiling up a storm, though everyone else was crying up a storm with tears of joy. We know it’s no coincidence that the joyous event came in the same week as the tragic one. We pray that everyone in the family will reach out to You, Lord, and know You are near, as we learned this week from Beamer’s crash. You’re there in our crises and our quiet times, our joys and our sorrows. (Psalm 9:10)