DailySusan Humor Blog

THE GOURD FAMILY

That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in Me, and I in Thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that Thou hast sent Me.
-- John 17:21

I fear for the country. The next generation bathes with ornamental gourds.

Maddy has been taking her pet gourd from our backyard garden into the bathtub. It does swan dives and rides down an imaginary waterslide.

Not only that, but she got her father to draw a face on the gourd, and she got her MOTHER to help her dress it in doll jammies. She made me kiss it goodnight and tuck it in with her. Now she’s going back out to ‘’The North One-Fortieth’’ to pick out adoptive parents and siblings.

You knew this was coming: we’re all out of our . . . gourds.

But at least having a bumper crop of them is helping me teach Maddy about diversity and unity. You know: there are green gourds, yellow gourds and orange gourds; tall ones, striped ones and two-toned ones; white ones with spikes, orange ones with warts . . . but they’re all gourds. They each look a little different, but they’re all about the same.

And it’s the same thing with people. That’s one of the most important lessons of childhood, one that ought to be taught sooner rather than later.

A friend of mine took her young daughter to a fancy buffet. They were in line behind a woman of heroic proportions. Before my friend could react, her daughter said, rapidly and loudly:

“MOMMY! THAT LADY IN FRONT OF US IS TAKING ALL THE FOOD, MOMMY! LOOK HOW MUCH FOOD SHE HAS ON HER PLATE, MOMMY! THERE WON’T BE ANY LEFT FOR US!”

(Why does the number of times your child calls you ‘’Mommy’’ in public increase exponentially when the child is saying something like THAT?)

My friend attempted to sink down to floor level like the witch in “Wizard of Oz.” Then she stared away vacantly, pretending not to have heard. Finally, she glared at the 80-something stranger behind her, hissing, “Can’t you control that kid?”

You have to have a sense of humor. At Omaha’s College World Series one year, our toddler spent the entire game gaping, and I do mean bug-eyed, slack-jawed GAPING, at two African-American guys sitting right behind us. They were good sports about it.

We’ve tried to teach our kids that people each look a little different on the outside, but we’re still all basically the same. Don’t stare, point, frown or say anything when you see someone a little different. Just ask Mom and Dad about it later, in private.

And we moms and dads need help. Some lessons take a lot of “reps.’’

At our local swimming pool the other day, Maddy was cavorting in the baby pool next to me, when here came an amputee.

He was in his 30s, on crutches, in swim trunks, with one leg ending just above the knee.

To my horror, Maddy pointed and hollered:

“MOMMY! MOMMY! LOOK WHAT HE DID TO HIS LEG!”

(There’s that “Mommy” tag again.)

The pool population hushed.

My face flamed. The guy had probably lost his leg in Desert Storm, Bosnia or Iraq, fighting for our freedom, only to be treated like THIS . . . when, whether it was Maddy’s adorable sprinkling of freckles across the bridge of her nose, or the anguished look on my face, or the ironic humor of the whole situation . . . whatever it was . . . the guy stopped and gave Maddy a great, big smile, and then looked over at me and gave me one, too . . . and a wink.

My heart melted in gratitude.

I could see Maddy beam back. The man’s sweet, tender reaction taught her more about unity than a million words from Mommy ever could. I’m sure it made Jesus smile big.

That guy must have guessed that there was more diversity going on with Maddy than meets the eye, too. I mean, how much more diverse can you GET than having an ornamental gourd for a best friend?

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Prayer request: We praise You, Jesus, for productive summers for our two college students. Grant Jordan and Neely safe travel and lots of endurance as they set up their first apartments in the coming week. Send them good and wise friends and counselors this year. May they continue to develop their grasp of Your purpose for their lives as they complete their senior and sophomore years, respectively. And ditto that prayer for every student throughout the land. (Proverbs 20:18)