DailySusan Humor Blog

I GET A BANG OUT OF VACUUMING

My husband was out of town for the weekend, hunting, and I was martyring out running the vacuum cleaner. All of a sudden, I heard a “rattle, rattle, rattle,” and figured the machine must have picked up a screw. But then:

BANG!!!

It was the loudest gunshot I have ever heard.

I was peeling myself down from the cathedral ceiling when I remembered a few evenings before. My husband had been playing with his new hunting toys . . . uh, I mean, inventorying his hunting accessories . . . and he showed me a pistol that shoots blanks. He’s going to use it to train our future hunting dog so he or she won’t be gun-shy.

Ironic, isn’t it? Well, I wasn’t shy about giving him a pep talk about not having that dangerous hunting stuff in the house, even if the bullet WAS only a blank.

And I declared that, according to the Second Amendment, vacuuming is hereby in violation of my constitutional rights. I have a right to keep and bear arms – my left one and my right one!

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Prayer request: Three couples need the gifts of the Spirit: courage for Wayne and Connie; he was just diagnosed with brain cancer at age 62, ready to retire . . . loving Christian friends to surround Barb as her husband Roger, a new believer, succumbs to melanoma . . . and a miracle for Chris, age 47, who is undergoing another round of radiation fighting his end stage of cancer with the hope of living to see his son’s graduation from pharmacy school. Spirit of Jesus, we lift these people to Your heart for love, joy and peace. (Galatians 5:22, 23)