Thursday, July 06, 2006

CHUTZPAH BY THE BOATLOAD

Heard about a middle-aged menace at a lakeside community near our town who was out boating while drunk. He reportedly ran his speedboat aground onto a beach at about 40 mph, horrifyingly near some kids and a dock.

The homeowner called police first, and the lake association president next. The drunken captain was ticketed for B.U.I. – Boating Under the Influence (of alcohol). He was banned from boating on that lake ever again.

Except . . . he was right back at it on the Fourth of July.

When homeowners confronted him, he had an amazing excuse. “Oh, that was another boat,” the culprit explained. “I’ve got a new boat now.”

If it’d been me, I’d have gotten . . . stern . . . and set sail to his . . . rudder.

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