DailySusan Humor Blog

WHAT NOT TO NAME YOUR PET

Everyone has supplied such wonderful suggestions for names for our new puppy, I’m stunned and confused, and the list is up over 20 names. Wednesday’s winners included “Happy,” which is certainly fitting for her personality, “Alley Oop,” very descriptive for an energetic Labrador, and “Quatro,” since we have four daughters and this will be our fourth dog.

I’m laying low, and hoping somebody else will choose the name and get it over with. Whatever they pick, I’ll love.

In the meantime, we have been advised of two pet names NOT to choose:

-- There was a 40-pound cat named “Snickers” who got loose in the neighborhood. The baby of the family, age 3, was going around yelling, “Nickers! Nickers!” which sounded suspiciously like a horrible epithet for persons of the African-American persuasion. The whole family is still embarrassed, years later.

-- There was a fuzzy little mop of a doggie brought home by a fraternity boy one summer. The dog was the boys’ mascot. One thing led to another, and the dog wound up staying with that family for a dozen years, a beloved pet. The puzzled parents thought she had an odd name for a fraternity mascot: “Chittette.” She must have a lot of French poodle blood; it must mean something in French, they reasoned. Years later, their son finally admitted that actually, the accent should be on the first syllable, not the second, and the ending sound was more like a “d” than “tte.” Ohhhhh. They finally got it! The best part is, their neighbors all figured it out years before they did, and played along.

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Prayer request: A former Omahan named Cathy is in the hospital in Belgium with pneumonia. It came on her quickly, while she was skiing in Switzerland with her family. She has four children. Oh, Breath of Life, restore health to this precious mother, wife, daughter and sister. We know You see her plight and hear her cries for help. Use this illness to teach her to count on You to get her over the moguls of life! (Psalm 22:24)