DailySusan Humor Blog

Let’s Stop Cloning Around

We need to ban human cloning right now, before things get too weird. The Nebraska Legislature may take up debate on that very matter next week with LB 602. Here’s what those senators need to know:

1. Whether it’s called “research cloning,” “therapeutic cloning” or some other euphemism, the process still deliberately creates human life and then destroys it. They can SAY the intent is for good, but you still have to look at the facts. Hmm. Now, where’d that road lead, that was paved with good intentions?

2. Cloning degrades women into farm animals. Poor women used to sell eggs on the side for a little extra income. But those were eggs from their CHICKENS. Egg harvesting would become a macabre sidelight to cloning. Cluck, cluck, cluck.

3. Remember Nuremberg? One of the worst things the Nazis did was experiment on human beings, knowing that what they were doing would kill them. After Nuremberg, that was never supposed to happen again. Is cloning NAZI same thing?

4. It would add at least two years to law school and mega-zillions to the cost of government, as we’d have to change all our laws and legal documents to accommodate clones -- everything from the Declaration of Independence (“all men are created equal, except clones, who are fully human but have no civil rights, not even the right to life”) to inheritance law (can you escape probate taxes forever by simply passing your wealth on to clone after clone after clone in perpetuity, since all of your clones would technically be of your same generation, instead of your descendants?).

5. We don’t even need it. The truly exciting and fully ethical realm of scientific research utilizing adult stem cells and umbilical cord tissue is the way to go.

So get on that phone and say, “No clone!” If you’re a Nebraskan, the bill is LB 602 and you can find your state senator’s contact information on http://www.unicam.state.ne.us/senators/index.htm

Also see these resources on cloning and other issues:

http://www.nebraskafamilycouncil.org

http://www.ethicalresearch.net

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Prayer request: Father, the people who are “for” cloning are blind to what’s wrong with it. Work, in Your mighty, mysterious and marvelous way, to open their eyes to how cloning violates Your ways. Let them see the right path to scientific progress. Help them to turn away from cloning, and pursue techniques that are pleasing to You, for the betterment of mankind and also to show reverence for the sanctity of the life You have given us. (Psalm 16:11)