DailySusan Humor Blog

HIRE HUMOR:
WHAT WERE THESE
JOB APPLICANTS THINKING?

Received this email with "25 Strange Résumé Blunders":

1. An applicant ghosted a head shot as the background to her resume.

2. Other Interests: Playing with my two dogs. (They actually belong to my wife, but I love the dogs more than my wife).

3. One applicant used colored paper and drew glitter designs around the border.

4. Hobbies: Getting drunk every night down by the water, playing my guitar and smoking pot.

5. Why Interested in position: To keep my parole officer from putting back me in jail.

6. A woman had attached a picture of herself in a mini mouse costume

7. Hobbies: Drugs and girls.

8. Under job-related skills for a web designer: Can function without additional oxygen at 24,000 feet.

9. My sister-in-law misspelled the word proofreading in her skill set.

10. The objective on one recent resume I received stated that the applicant wished to pursue a challenging account executive position with our rival firm.

11. Objective: Career on the Information Supper Highway.

12. Experience: Stalking, shipping & receiving.

13. I am great with the pubic.

14. A candidate listed her e-mail address as pornstardelight@*****.com.

15. The applicant listed her name as Alice in the resume but wrote Alyce on the onsite application.

16. One candidate's electronic resume included links to her homepage, where there were pictures of her in the nude.

17. Sent out my resume on the back side of a draft of a cover letter to another firm.

18. My duties included cleaning the restrooms and seating the customers.

19. One applicant for a nursing position noted that she didn't like dealing with blood or needles.

20. Achievements: Nominated for prom queen.

21. I once received a resume with a head-and-shoulders picture in the top left of the first page. The picture was of a lion's head, with a coat, shirt, and tie.

22. A resume was printed on the back of the person's current employer's letterhead.

23. One resume that came across my desk stated how the individual had won a contest for building toothpick bridges in middle school.

24. A resume had several grease stains and a smudge of chocolate on it.

25. Hobbies: Having a good time.