THE PUTT-PUTT ADVANTAGE

My favorite girl golfer hit her drive on a par 4 recently. But it happened to bounce down the cart path a lot farther than it would have rolled on the grass.

It bounced and ran downhill for a while, still on the cart path, picking up steam.

Finally, it struck the curb of the cart path and careened right onto the green. She was putting for eagle!

Ironically, she 3-putted from there. She still bogeyed the hole. But boy, it was fun to see the kind of structure that usually guides your ball toward the hole in mini-golf work to her advantage in the real thing!

I . . . KNOW . . . NOTHINK!

Did you see and hear that whole shelf of little mummies, ghosts, skeletons, witches and creepy crawlies at WalMart, mysteriously jiggling and dancing and making a lot of noise?

Maddy and I don't know a thing about it. :>)

SO MUCH EASIER TO RHYME THAN 'MULLET'

Made a collage today of newspaper photos and headline words all about the University of Nebraska football team. Sent it to a beloved young person who's stationed with the military overseas. He's missing all the action of the games, so hope this poster will cheer him up:

Favorite spot: in all different fonts, sizes and colors, I cut out letters to spell out"THROW TO THE FRO" -- a reference to wide receiver Kenny Bell. His Afro hairdo is cooped up and controlled inside his football helmet. But when he takes off his helmet, that 'fro is so big that it shades the entire South stadium.

Bell is a bell-ringer of a player for his team. That slogan is catchy! Hope it rings the chimes of that faraway football fan. His mission right now is much more serious than a football player's, but he loves that game and that team with all his heart. For his military service on our behalf, to us, he is also a . . . BIGWIG!!!

MAN BABIES

These are odd and disturbing, which is why I like them:

www.manbabies.com

A DIFFERENT KIND OF PODCASTING

The Bible speaks of "the day of the locusts." Well, it's the time of year of the locusts around here -- honey locust trees, that is. They're shedding their big, distinctive pods, bigtime.

We just drove under a shower of the brown pods falling from trees because of high winds. Apparently, one of them got stuck somehow in the undercarriage of my Mini Cooper. It was kind of like a playing card clothespinned onto bike spokes.

It was rattling around and making so much noise that I quipped, "We're PODCASTING!"

At the stop sign, we went five feet in reverse, and it fell out, no worse for wear. Didn't even say "Pod-on me." :>)

AT LAST! SOMEONE IN NEBRASKA WHO CAN TACKLE!

Not to diminish the poor lady's injuries, but . . . did you hear about the woman who sued the University of Nebraska after she had been tackled so hard by one or two other women at a ladies' "Intro to Football" event that her earrings flew off and she bonked her head, hard?

http://www.omaha.com/article/20120905/BIGRED/309059787

Heyyyyy! The Nebraska Cornhuskers could USE some strong tacklers. Our defenders sure didn't even come close to making any UCLA players' earrings fly off last weekend.

Maybe they should be recruiting at ladies' events like this, in the future. Gulp! :>)

IN FOOTBALL, AS IN LIFE, TIMING IS EVERYTHING

Wonder if it was just a coincidence, or a wise media buy:

Did you hear the ad for "suicide prevention" during the brutal post-game show on radio station KFAB, which covers Nebraska football, after the UCLA Bruins unexpectedly won, 36-30, dashing the high hopes of the long-suffering Nebraska fans?

If it was deliberate, then someone's wasting talents in the marketing business and should get involved in Vegas, STAT.

WHEN AN 'F' IS A GOOD GRADE

A man told an inspiring story in church today. He told how his life had come back together again, better than ever, after he went through a series of terrible things: a couple of deaths, job loss, home loss, divorce, and on and on.

He said the turning point was when he was in counseling with a minister, and confessed that he felt like he had a big "F" on his forehead -- "F" for "Failure."

But the minister corrected: "No, it's 'F' for 'Forgiven'!"

I was telling Maddy about it when she quickly interjected:

"Or 'F' for 'Effort'!"

Oh, these kids today . . . though I think a good self-image comes from that, too, and I think her humor made the Master smile a little bit.